Sunday, May 15, 2011

Adoption Celebration Question

I have been doing some reading lately and wanted to get opinions of others in my adoption world.  Coming up in less than 2 months will be the day we became the Henderson Family as it is now.....some call it gotcha day, some adoption day.  I know the day changes as children get older, more children are added to the family, or you have biological children.  It is an important day in our world as parents but I do not want to highlight Tedi's loss of his birth family.  I want to be a good mom, do the right things for my son. 

Not sure what we will decide upon but I wanted to see what everyone else's thoughts on this are... 


  1. We celebrate Gotcha Day at our house. We don't go overboard.. no gifts or things like that. Our first was last year, and we did have balloons beacuse Ellie LOVES balloons. Otherwise, we let her pick where we ate dinner (McDonalds) and we had a tea party together which was her idea as well. Nothing fancy, just family fun. We talk a lot about her birth mom in ET, so she is well aware of her and why she could not take care of Ellie. Actually, the thought of celebrating Gotcha Day being like a celebration of losing her birth family never crossed my mind, and it certainly hasn't crossed Ellie's. It may as she gets older, but I think the more open we are about telling her all of her story, the better that will be.

    We like to make up holidays to celebrate in our home. So, Bryan also has a special day. June 21st is "healing day" in our house. That's the day he had his last surgery after a horrible 11 months filled with hospital visits, surgeries and sickness. That was the day God finally took it all away and healed him, so we celebrate it every year. Fun times!

    Good luck in figuring out what works best for your family. I think everyone is different in this!! Again, we're so happy for y'all and for Tedi! And we still REALLY want to meet! He and El would be big buds, I'm sure!

  2. We're thinking of using "American Anniversary", the day that Hana arrived in the US...because she had an IR-3 is the day she became a US citizen also.

    We too plan to keep the day low key. Let her choose dinner that night and maybe an activity (zoo, park, etc). Hana is 13 and has been home 7 months now.

    We might do something like a small gift that is related to her 'american' maybe a book of American themed poems or red/white/blue scarf or stuffed animal. We talk alot about Ethiopia and about her Ethiopian family (mom and dad are deceased). She has a lot of pride in ET and likes to wear ET colors, but also thinks it is cool that she is an American too...she says she has 2 countries. She has things up in her room (Posters, photos, etc) that represent both countries.

    I'm amxious to hear what others do.


  3. We do something very special as a family. The first two years we went to Dutch Wonderland, a little kid's theme park. Last year we went to the beach for the weekend. We just take time to do something out of the ordinary, special. We call it "Gotcha Day". We "got" each other that day... There will be and are times to deal with and talk about the loss associated with adoption, but for us, that day has been about what we all have gained...each other. However, if at some point our children want to discuss the loss or they feel loss on that day, we will take our cues from them as to what we do for Gotcha Day.
    What did you decide?