Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Victoria's Secret

I don't sweat.  I mean, give me a three mile run in the Caribbean without air conditioning or an ocean breeze, and Yes, I will sweat.  I was not one of those girls in high school basketball that was dripping after the tip off.  Yet, as a grown woman, an educated doctor, I still break out into a cold sweat upon entering Victoria's Secret.

I get that is it "the" store for mainstream bra and underwear buying, especially if you let your preteen wear undies that say "pink" or "naughty" or have cherries on them.... that is your decision.  I own several of their bras, but have never liked their underwear.... even at my smallest, I found them undesirable. 

Nevertheless, I find myself venturing into the overwhelming walls of pink and white for every Semi-Annual sale, just for "giggles".... or with hopes of getting lucky.  I am very self aware.  I know I am not skinny....not the VS prototype..... not the nice B or C cup.  I am aware of this.  Whether the size I am now or my smallest, I push the limits of not spilling out of their beautiful turquoise, red, and coral brassieres. 

Well, I found myself there last night... Alone.  My friend was occupied with in-laws.  My other one did not answer her phone.  My loyal semi-annual sale friend lives in Nicholasville.  Of course I left JT and Tedi at home watching Louisville football.  I grabbed a couple of options and stood there, clammy, in the overdone dressing room.  My back was sweating and my heart of was racing.  I was hungry.... then the same sales girl who opened the room for me, unlocks and starts to walk in the room..  I mean, SERIOUSLY size 4 twenty two year old blonde....cut me a little slack.  Two bras in, I decided I was done... Cue the self deprecation.  Maybe once I shed some more pounds I will re-visit the haven of pink.....

I did end up with bras that night....but it was not without a stop for a pair of earrings I really wanted.  I know, not a great example but they were less than $10 and I tithe... don't judge.  

I hope you enjoy your Vicky's experience, but I thought others out there would enjoy this huniliating story at my expense.

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